I haven’t read any of my book reviews lately. When your world stops you tend to assume everyone else’s does too.
Last night I found myself reading two reviews on Amazon for Freedom. They were not good.
Maria states, “The word God appears in every single page of this book.” I’m not sure that’s true but she could be close.
Doctor Wheat writes, “The writer has a really bad attitude. We bought it for a friend and will not consider giving it to them.” - This one got me.
I woke this morning thinking about my attitude while writing Freedom. How did DW see it as bad, so bad they would not give it to the intended? I feel awful he/she bought the thing. They deserve a refund at the very least, but then again perhaps better yet some insight because I think I see why he/she feels this way. Freedom was written from a truthful perspective and one must always be well braced when meeting up with honesty.
When our daughter was very young in the early 90′s the only books I could find were stories of mothers who successfully beat Autism. They were few and far between and my only examples at the time. I tried every therapy, enzyme, supplement, and behavior modification that came our way and nothing worked. Our daughter wouldn’t heal and I felt like a failure until one day the Lord (here I go again mentioning God) spoke clearly to my heart that He would not heal her for two reasons: ONE – I wanted it more for my self than for her and TWO – He could do more through not healing her than if He did.
I then realized not all healings occur this side of heaven. Some are saved for heaven in order to do a greater work on earth. I would have to work through the immense sense of loss. Our daughter had not died but the normal one I’d hoped for vanished and it hurt. I was moving through the stages of grief and sometimes it was ugly.
Perhaps the honest account was too much for DW. Maybe my pain only magnified hers I don’t know. All I know is I tried to always point to God because He is the one who got me through. He listened to me gripe, complain, cry and fight. I’d regress and He’s propel me forward. He loved me when I was most unlovable and no human on earth could have handled the intricacies of my pain, nor should they have. Only our heavenly Father is equipped for that load.
Yes, I mention God a lot. This isn’t going to change. When all is said and done I will have to answer to Him not the stars on Amazon.
As far as as bad attitude, that’s opinion. DW feels I have one and I’m glad she can voice what she thinks. She is no enemy (unless she is in fact a he which then I could be labeled a presumptuous feminist; a whole other ball of wax). DW is being honest and I appreciate it. Maybe some day she’ll/he’ll change his/her mind, maybe not. Either way’s fine. No hard feelings.
This goes for Maria too. God bless her. (sorry)